Cordelia: Would it kill you to hum a little tune when sneaking up on people?
Angel: I don't hum. I'm confused here. Why is Mrs. Benson filed under 'P'?
Cordelia: That's not a 'P' that's and 'F'. Or is it an 'R'?
Angel: I don't know. Maybe we can be a little less - young and carefree with the filing?
Cordelia: Oh, it's an 'F'. I remember now.
Angel: All right, so... Why is it Mrs. Benson is filed under 'F'?
Cordelia: Because she is from France. - Remember what a pain she was?
Angel: Yeah. It made me want to drink a lot.
Cordelia: That's the French for you.

Sarina: Hi. I'm Sarina. Nice axe.

Angel: You've been seeing someone. How come I didn't know?
Cordelia: Because I'm ashamed of you. Not to mention how you'd embarrass me by giving him the third degree.
Emily: Your boss could give me the third degree anytime.

Angel: So, La Brea. Sounds like that could be an evening with all sorts of evening type... I-I heard the bands there are...
Sarina: They don't have any bands.
Angel: Which I like. Because if it's too loud...
Emily: Want to come?
Angel: Oh, I think I may be busy. Besides, ah, I, uhm, I don't lounge all that well.
Wesley: Good one! Oh, yes. No, he's ah, he's no lounger...
* Wesley puts an arm around Angel *
Wesley: ...this one.
Sarina: The good ones are always gay.

Wesley: Don't move a muscle. - Demon spawn! Cowards, don't make me thrash it out of you. Where do you lay your eggs? In the cellar?
Angel: Wesley...
Wesley: In the bedroom?
Angel: Yeah, that's right, termites lay their eggs anywhere, such as next door.
Wesley: Oh.
Angel: And we fight termites, where ever they may roam.
Wesley: Sorry about the door.

Wesley: I mean, no one is more fond about Cordelia than I, but if she wants to go gad-abouting with those doxies...
Angel: I think they liked you.
Wesley: Really! I-I didn't mean doxy in the sexual promiscuous sense, exactly. I-I... You don't think sticking the axe in the wall put them off?
Angel: That was charming.
Wesley: What about the fact that they thought we were gay?
Angel: Adds mystery.

Cordelia: Go home? I mean, right away? It's still early... in Australia. Will you come in?

Wilson: That's some jaunty Polka.

Cordelia: All right, Dennis, knock it off! This is the one guy, I've actually liked in a long time, and if you keep killing the mood, I'll kill you! All right, empty threat, you being a ghost and already dead and all. But I'll do something worse! I'll play 'Evita' around the clock. The one with Madonna!
Wilson: Who are you talking to?
Cordelia: Uhm... my ghost. I have a ghost. He's jealous... Kidding. The apartment's great, but things are always breaking and, uhm, and I have no one to complain to, so sometimes just to keep myself company I talk to myself.

Cordelia: I'm ready to wake up now. I-I don't seem to be - waking up. - Help me.

Angel: Shh, shh. It's okay. Have you talked to Wilson?
Cordelia: No. I haven't talked to anyone. What would I say to him? I had a really great time. I think you left something at my place? I don't think this is right.

Bartender: So, you're her boyfriend?
Angel: No. I'm family.

Pregnant woman: Do you know what it is?... Boy or girl?

Cordelia: You saw what's inside of me?
Wesley: I think we should find Angel.
Cordelia: Wesley, please just tell me!
Wesley: Cordelia...
Cordelia: Do they look healthy?

Cordelia: You're not going to hurt my babies. No one is going to hurt my babies.

Angel: I really don't like it when people shoot me.

Wesley: As a heathen I wouldn't expect you to be familiar with the biblical story of David and Goliath. But I assure you it's of particular relevance to this situation.
Demon: You said you came here to do battle, then let's fight and be done.
Wesley: Yes, well, - as a point of courtesy, - I like to get to know my opponents, before I engage them in mortal combat. Do you, ah - do you have any hobbies?

Cordelia: I really hate dating.

Cordelia: I learned something, too. I learned, uhm, - men are evil? Oh, wait, - I knew that. I leared that LA is full of self-serving phonies. No, - had that one down, too. Uh... sex is bad?
Angel: We all knew that.
Cordelia: Okay. I learned that I have two people I trust absolutely with my life. - And that part's new.

Episode Guide: Expecting

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- - last updated: 6-28-02 - -