Spike: What's Big Blue up to anyway? He just sits there.
Judge: I am preparing.
Spike: Yeah. Its interesting to me that 'preparing' looks a great bit like sitting on your ass! When do we destroy the world already?
Judge: My strength grows, and with every life I take it will increase further.
Spike: So let's take some. I'm bored.
Joyce: So, did you have fun last night?
Joyce: At Willow's.
Buffy: Yeah. Yeah, fun at Willow's. You know, she's a fun machine.
Joyce: Is something wrong?
Buffy: No. What would be wrong?
Joyce: I don't know. You just look...
Xander: Yeah? Well, those of us who were born with feelings are gonna do something about this.
Willow: My God, you people are all... Well, I'm upset, and I can't think of a mean word right now, but that's what you are, and we're going to the factory!
Xander: We were just going to rescue you.
Willow: Well some of us were.
Giles: Well, I-I would have.
Giles: The Judge, i-is he...
Buffy: No assembly required. He's active.
Drusilla: I'm naming all the stars.
Spike: You can't see the stars love. That's the ceiling. Also, its day.
Drusilla: I can see them. But I've named them all the same name. And there's terrible confusion.
Spike: Did you see any further? Do you know what happens to Angel?
Angelus: Well, he moves to New York and tries to fulfill that Broadway dream. It's tough sledding but one day he's working in the chorus when the big star twists her ankle.
Spike: You don't give up, do you?
Angelus: As long as there's injustice in the world, as long as scum like you is walking... well, rolling the streets... I'll be around. Look over your shoulder. I'll be there.
Angelus: Yeah, baby. I'm back.
Drusilla: Psst. We're going to destroy the world. Want to come?
Xander: Sorry I snapped at you before.
Cordelia: Well, I'm reeling from that new experience.
Xander: I was crazed. I wasn't thinking.
Cordelia: I know. You were too busy rushing off to die for your beloved Buffy. You'd never die for me.
Xander: No, I might die from you. Does that get me any points?
Xander: Come on, can't we just kiss and make up?
Cordelia: I don't wanna make up. But I'm okay with the other part.
Willow: I knew it! I knew it! Well not 'knew it' in the sense of having the slightest idea, but I knew there was something I didn't know! You two were fighting way too much. Its not natural!
Xander: I know it's weird...
Willow: Weird? It's against all laws of God and Man! It's Cordelia! Remember? The, the 'We Hate Cordelia' club of which you are the treasurer!
Xander: Willow, we were just kissing. It doesn't mean that much.
Willow: No. It just means that you'd rather be with someone you hate than with me.
Buffy: Angel! I love you.
Angelus: Love you, too. I'll call you.
Enyos: To the modern man vengeance is a verb, an idea. Payback. One thing for another. Like commerce. Not with us. Vengeance is a living thing. It passes through generatons. It commands. It kills.
Jenny: You told me to watch Angel. You told me to keep him from the Slayer. I tried. But there are other factors. There are terrible things happening here that we cannot control.
Enyos: We control nothing. We are not wizards, Janna. We merely play our part.
Enyos: Yes. It is not justice we serve. It is vengeance.
Jenny: You are a fool. We're all fools.
Xander: Whoa. Whoa! I... I think I'm having a thought. Yeah, yeah, yeah, that's a thought. Now I'm having a plan. Now I'm having a wiggins.
Willow: What is it, Angel?
Angelus: It's amazing.
Buffy: Angel, there must be some part of you inside that still remembers who you are.
Angelus: Dream on schoolgirl. Your boyfriend is dead. You're all gonna join him.
Buffy: Leave Willow alone, and deal with me.
Angelus: But she's so cute and helpless. Really a turn on. Things are about to get very interesting.
Cordelia: What are we gonna do?
Giles: I'm leaning towards a blind panic myself.
Cordelia: This is great. There's an unkillable demon in town, Angel's joined his team, the Slayer is a basket case... I'd say we've hit bottom.
Xander: I have a plan.
Cordelia: Oh, no, here's a lower place.
Cordelia: Care to let me in on the plan I'm a part of?
Cordelia: Why not?
Xander: Because if I tell you, then you won't do it. Just meet me at Willow's house in half an hour and wear something trashy... er.
Angelus: Force won't get it done. You gotta work from the inside. To kill this girl... you have to love her.
Angel: I love you.
Angel: You have to know what to see.
Cordelia: Who am I supposed to be again?
Xander: You're supposed to be a girl. Think you can handle it?
Cordelia: HI! I'm not a soldier... right?
Xander: Look, I... I just want to give her the tour. Uh, you know what I'm saying.
Soldier: The tour.
Xander: Well, you know the ladies. They like to see the big guns. Gets them all hot and bothered. Can you cut me some slace, gimme a blind eye?
Soldier: And why should I?
Xander: Well, if you do, I won't tell Colonel Newsome that your boots ain't regulation, your post wasn't covered, and you hold your gun like a sissy girl.
Soldier: You got 20 minutes, nimrod.
Xander: I just need five. Un, forget I said that last part.
Cordelia: Okay, what was that? And who were you?
Cordelia: So, does looking at guns really make girls wanna have sex? That's scary.
Xander: Yeah, I guess.
Cordelia: Well, does looking at guns make you wanna have sex?
Xander: I'm seventeen. Looking at linoleum makes me wanna have sex.
Oz: So, do you guys steal weapons from the Army a lot?
Willow: Well, we don't have cable, so we have to make our own fun.
Oz: I get you.
Oz: Sometimes when I'm sitting in class. You know, I'm not thinking about class, cause that would never happen. I think about kissing you. And it's like everything stops. It's like, it's like freeze frame. Willow kissage. Oh, I'm not gonna kiss you.
Willow: What? But freeze frame!
Oz: Well, to the casual observer, it would appear that you're trying to make your friend Xander jealous or even the score or something. And that's on the empty side. See, in my fastsy when I'm kissing you, you're kissing me. It's okay. I can wait.
Spike: What happens if your girlfriend shows up?
Angelus: I'm gonna give her a kiss. Don't you look spiffy?
Xander: Happy Birthday, Buffy, I hope you like the color.
Buffy: Everybody keep back. Damage control only. Take out any lesser vamps if you can. I'll handle the Smurf.
Buffy: I think I got his attention.
Judge: You're a fool. No weapon forged can stop me.
Buffy: That was then. This is now.
Judge: What's that do?
Buffy: Best present ever.
Xander: Knew you'd like it.
Cordelia: Pieces? We get the pieces. Our job sucks!
Oz: Uh... arm.
Joyce: Did I miss anything?
Buffy: Um... just some singing and some running around.
Joyce: Mm. I'm sorry I didn't have time to make you a real cake.
Buffy: No. This is good.
Joyce: But we're still going shopping on Saturday. So what'd you do for your birthday? Did you have fun?
Buffy: I got older.
Joyce: You look the same to me. Happy Birthday. I don't have to sing, do I?
Joyce: Well, go on, make a wish.
Buffy: I'll just let it burn.