Buffy: "You demons can't resist a run and stumble, can you?"
Buffy: "One down, one... gone."
Willow: "So scabby demon got away?"
Buffy: "Scabby demon number two got away. Scabby demon number one, big check in the slay column."
Willow: "I don't like this whole no mouth thing. It's disquieting."
Buffy: "Well no moutn means no teeth. Unless they have them somewhere else."
Giles: "Based upon the supposed date, graduation day, and the mayor being impervious to harm, I've cross referenced-"
Xander: "He's a cross-referencing fool."
Giles: "I was just filling Buffy in on my progress regarding the research on the acension."
Wesley: "Oh, and what took up the rest of the minute?"
Xander: "Hogan Martin thinks he's soooo hot. Like we shouold all be awed by him cuz he can put a ball in the net."
Hogan: "Hey Xander."
Xander: "He said my name! He knows my name!"
Willow: "That's my little trooper."
Giles: "You touched one of the demons?"
Buffy: "A good touch, not a bad touch."
Giles: "It says they can infect the host."
Buffy: "Infect? Infect? GILES! INFECT?!"
Giles: "Oh um, infect the host with an aspect of the demon. That's all it says."
Willow: "Well, according to Freddy's latest editorial, 'the pep rally is a place for psudeo-prostitutes to provoke men into a sexual frenzy which, when thwarted, results in pointless athletic competition'."
Xander: "And the downside being?"
Willow: "The school paper is edging on depressing lately. You guys notice that?"
Oz: "I don't know. I always go straight to the obits."
Buffy: "I'm suddenly going to grow this demon part and we don't even know what it is. It could be claws or scales... What?"
Willow: "Was it a boy demon?"
Cheerleaders: "T. O. M. It's Tom. Goooo Tom."
Xander: "They really are very good!"
Oz: "Their spelling's improved."
Xander: "You know Oz, I look at all this beauty, all these healthy young women and I wonder why I ever wasted my time on Cordelia. I mean, look at her. She's no better looking than the rest of them."
Oz: "None of them are really my-"
Xander: "Oh my God, he's looking at her! He's got his filthy adult Pierce Brosny eyes all over my Cordy."
Oz: "You're a very complex man, aren't you?"
Angel: "Hey, I won't let anything happen to you if I can help it. No matter what, I'll always be with you. Hey, I'll love you even if you're covered with slime."
Buffy: "I liked everything until that last part.'
Xander: "Yeah, for a minute there I thought you're gonna make an expression."
Oz: "Well, I felt one coming on. I won't lie."
Willow: "Man, I've never seen anyone jump like Hogan Martin. They should call him -- the jumper."
Xander: "Or a name that isn't an articl of women's clothing."
Cordelia: "That was an incredible game! I've never cheered so hard in my life. I still have knee marks on my back... From the pyramid."
Xander: I wonder if she and Wesley have kissed?
Buffy: "It really bugs you, huh?"
Buffy: "Cordelia and Wesley, smooching."
Xander: "Man, you read my mind."
Mr. Beech: Students. If we could just get rid of all the students.
Student w/Baggy Pants: I swear, someday my pants are gonna fall right off.
Buffy: "It was happening out in the hallway. Principal Snyder has Walk Like an Egyption stuck in his head. And the boys in this school are seriously disturbed."
Willow: Buffy did the reading? Buffy understood the reading?
Xander: When did she study? Was I supposed to study? Ms. Murray's kinda hot.
Ms. Murray: "We all have our little internal Iagos, that tell us our husbands or our girlfriends or whatever, don't really love us. But you never really see what's in someone's heart."
Angel: "You don't have to play games with me Buffy. Ever."
Buffy: "Well, you're not exactly Joe-here's-what-I'm-thinking."
Angel: "So ask me."
Buffy: "Oh, but that woulda made sense."
Angel: "And Buffy, be careful with this gift. A lot of things that seem strong and good and powerful, they can be painful."
Buffy: "Like say, immortality?"
Angel: "Exactly, I'm dying to get rid of that."
Angel: "I'm a funny guy."
Oz: I am my thoughts. If they exist in her, Buffy contains everything that is me and she becomes me. I cease to exist.
Xander: What am I gonna do? I think about sex all the time! Sex! Help! 4 times 5 is thirty. 5 times 6 is 32. Naked girls. Naked Women! Naked Buffy! Oh stop me!
Buffy: "God Xander! Is that all you think about?"
Xander: "Actually... bye."
Wesley: "Xander has just illustrated something. Chances are, you're all going to be thinking whatever you least want Buffy to hear. It's a question, of course, of mental discipline."
Giles: "He's right. There are..."
Wesley: Look at Cordelia. No! Don't look at Cordelia! She's a student! Oh I am a bad man. I'm a bad, bad man! Wesley: "Excuse me."
Oz: No one else exists either. Buffy is all of us. We think. Therefore, she is.
Buffy: "Guess I won't be writing that book, 'Gaining Friends through Telepathy'."
Cordelia: Whatever. I wonder when I can go.
Cordelia: "Whatever. Can I go?"
Wesley: "Excuse me. Can you hear me thinking in here? I could go out into the hall."
Jonathan: Am I normal?
Jonathan: "Are you through with the mashed potatoes?"
Jonathan: She doesn't even know I'm here. Look at everybody, none of this matters.
Voice: This time tomorrow, I'll kill you all!
Cordelia: "I told them not to move you. They probably severed your spinal cord."
Xander: "See, I've been saying for years that the lunch lady's gonna do us all in with that Mulligan Stew."
Xander: "I mean, what the hell's a Mulligan?"
Xander: "Yeah, I mean, who hasn't just idly though about taking out the whole place with a semi-automatic?... I said idly."
Giles: If it doesn't go away she'll go insane.
Buffy: "Why are you...? You had sex with Giles?! YOU HAD SEX WITH GILES?!"
Joyce: "It was the candy! We were teenagers!"
Buffy: "On the hood of a police car?!?"
Joyce: "I'll be downstairs. You feel better."
Cordelia: "I think I should work with Wesley."
Xander: "You have no shame."
Cordelia: "Oh please, like shame has something to be proud of."
Cordelia: "Hi Mr. Beech! I was just wondering, were you planning on killing a bunch of people tomorrow? Oh, it's for the yearbook!"
Nancy: "Do I often imagine classmates are spying on me, or otherwise acting suspiciously?"
Nancy: "Not until just now."
Xander: "Today's editorial titled 'Big Game Draws Mindless Brain Dead Mob'."
Cordelia: "Does he mention the cheerleaders? Because we were on."
Oz: "Dingoes Ate My Baby play their instruments as if they have plump polish sausages taped to their fingers."
Freddy: "Sorry man."
Oz: "No, it's fair."
Xander: "You're okay. Can you hear thoughts?... Just when I wasn't thinking about sex."
Cordelia: "'By this time tomorrow you'll all know what I've done. I'm sure you understand that I had to do it, and that although death is never easy, it's the only way'. God! Doesn't anyone write in to praise the cheerleaders! We are so unsung."
Willow: "Jonathan! Oh, I had him in my grasp. Slippery weasel."
Xander: "Ooo, Jello."
Buffy: "I don't think about you much at all. Nobody here really does. Bugs you, doesn't it. You have all this pain, and all these feelings and nobody's really paying attention."
Jonathan: "You think I just want attention?"
Buffy: "No. I think you're up in the clock tower with a high-powered rifle because you wanna blend in. Believe it or not, Jonathan, I understand about the pain."
Jonathan: "Oh right. Cuz the burden of being beautiful and athletic, that's a crippler."
Buffy: "You know what? I was wrong. You are an idiot. My life happens to on occasion, suck beyond the telling of it. Sometimes more than I can handle. And it's not just mine. Every single person down there is ignoring your pain because they're too busy with their own. The beautiful ones. The popular ones. The guys that pick on you. Everyone. If you could hear what they were feeling. The loneliness. The confusion. It looks quiet down there. It's not. It's deafening."
Jonathan: "I just wanted it to stop."
Buffy: "Yeah, well, mass-murder, not really doctor recomended for that type of pain. Besides, prison, you know, it's a lot like high school, only instead of noogies-"
Jonathan: "What are you talking about?"
Buffy: "Actions having consequences. You know, stuff like that."
Jonathan: "I, I, I wouldn't ever hurt anybody. I came up here to kill myself."
Xander: "RAT POISON! RAT POISON!"
Giles: "I'm glad to see you've recovered from your psychic encounter more or less intact. Feel up to some training?"
Buffy: "Sure. We can work out after school. You know, if you're not too busy having sex with my MOTHER!"
* Giles walks into a tree *