Buffy: So. We meet at last, Mister Drippy!

Dawn: Man! How much water can they fit in one set of pipes?
Tara: If I understand right the entire city water supply.
Willow: It's like little clown cars at the circus.

Buffy: Dawn, breakfast is the most important meal of the day. It's unbelievably important. You should eat breakfast at least three times a day.

Xander: And a big Sunnydale round of applause for Tito the Amazing, plumber extraordinaire!
Tara: So how's everything looking down there?
Xander: Like we should start gathering up two of every animal.

Willow: Buffy, I know you're still getting back on your feet after...
Buffy: Lying flat on my back?

Dawn: So, what do we do?
Buffy: Easy! We burn the house to the ground and collect the insurance. Plus, fire, pretty!... You guys?... I'm kidding.

Buffy: It's not like it's the end of the world... Which is too bad, because that I'm really good at.

Anya: I know how! Um, if... if you want to pay... uh... every bill here, and every bill coming, and have enough to start a nice college fund for Dawn? Start charging!
Buffy: For what?
Anya: For slaying vampires! You're providing a valuable service to the whole community. I say, cash in!

Buffy: Hey! Are you in the wrong line? That's for deposits, that's for withdrawls, and this one is for getting kicked in the face... Stupid skirt!

Willow: No! Anger is a big powerful emotion! You should feel!
Buffy: Well that's good then... Done.
Willow: Well then let me make you mad again... ready? Um? Last semester? I slept with Riley.
Buffy: And you know, I really doubt it.
Willow: Caught me. Big fib... to cover up the sleazy affair I had with Angel!
Buffy: Will... what the hell are you doing?
Willow: Pissing you off.
Buffy: Yes, true. Why?

Xander: Score one for Captin Logic!
Anya: No, no. Captin Logic is not steering this tugboat. I smell Captin Fear at the wheel.

Giles: Oh God, Buffy! You're alive. You're here... And you're still remarkably strong.

Buffy: I mean, yeah, sleeping is hard, but just because of the waking up in a box thing. So maybe waking up's the problem. You know, but just for a second. I sleep okay. Great even. Except, you know, for the dreams...

Buffy: I know what you meant. It was just a little post-post-mortem comedy.

Jonathan: We're like super-villians.
Jonathan/Andrew/Warren: Mwhahahahahaaaa!

Warren: Yes, truly Lord Jonathan is the wisest of us all!
Jonathan: Wha...?
Andrew: Uh, yeah. Long live our noble lord and master.
Jonathan: You guys suck!

Andrew: Hello! Screen-wipe! New scene!

Jonathan: Are we really gonna kill her? That's so sad!
Warren: Shut up. Whine-athon.
Andrew: But, I... I don't want to kill Buffy either.
Jonathan: Yeah, she saved my life a bunch of times!... Plus she's hot.

Andrew: And you know, killing people is not why we got together.
Jonathan: Yeah, we teamed up with one clear super-cool mission statement, remember?
Warren: So... you guys want to team up and take over Sunnydale?
Jonathan/Andrew: *shrug* O.k.
*end flashback*
Warren: Of course I remember. It was last month.

Jonathan: Dude, you know we have a mission! Shrink rays. Trained Gorillas. Workable prototype jet-packs. And chicks, chicks, chicks. I know that's the action I signed on for!

Jonathan/Andrew/Warren's list:
To Do:
*Control the weather
*Minaturize Fort Knox
*Conjure Fake IDs
*Shrink Ray
*The Gorilla Thing

Giles: You're a very stupid girl.

Willow: You're right. The magics I used are very powerful. I'm very powerful. And maybe it's not such a good idea for you to piss me off.

Spike: You want me to take them out? Give me a hell of a headache, but I could probably thin the heard a little... Knew I could get a grin.

Bufy: Why are you always around when I'm miserable?
Spike: Cause that's when you're alone, I reckon. I'm not one for crowds myself these days.
Buffy: Me neither.
Spike: That works out nicely then.

Buffy: No! Full... copper... re-pipe! No... more... full... copper... re-pipe!

Spike: Whoa. Did you know this place was flooded?

Andrew: I just can't believe it. We did it! We can do anything! We can stay up all night if we wanted!
Warren: Whoa, whoa, whoa. Don't get all crazy on us, Andrew.
Andrew: I was only saying.

Jonathan: What are we gonna do about Buffy? I mean , sooner or later the Slayer has to come after us.
Andrew: Bring her on.
Warren: We could hypnotize her.
Andrew: Make her our willing sex-bunny.
Jonathan: I'm putting that on the list!

Warren: Dude! Don't be a geek!

Episode Guide: Flooded

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- - last updated: 1-27-02 - -