Buffy: "You'd think these people had never seen an apocalypse before."
Clem: "It's getting bad here. Really bad. Hellmouth acting up again, people feeling it, getting crazier. You can't swing a cat without hitting some kind of demonic activity. Not that I swing cats... or eat. Nope... Cutting way back. Cholesterol. Morals! I mean, morals."
Man: "A single step and it is upon us. It is nigh! From beneath you it-"
Willow: "I thought we were going to... there were gonna be card games."
Xander: "I might see you tonight - without the depth perception, of course, but still."
Willow: "Let's order some cherry-flavored off-brand gelatin and then I think we'll be up for a rousing game of-"
Xander: "I might need a parrot."
Xander: "Well, to go with the eye patch, to really complete the look. I think I still have that costume from Halloween."
Willow: "Yeah, and don't underestimate the impact of a peg leg. Maybe the hospital can hook you up with a nice one. Maybe they have a 'two body parts for the price of one' kind of deal."
Xander: "Oh, you know what the best part is? No one will ever make me watch Jaws 3D again."
Willow: "Yeah, and you'll never have to..."
Xander: "Oh, Willow... please don't."
Anya: "I have been out talking to some of my old contacts and they've provided some surprising bits of news. Yay for them! Okay, for example, ubervamps can be staked right through the heart. Zing, poof! Just like regular vamps. We didn't know this. Of course, these guys have incredibly strong sternums, so it's a lot like driving a wooden stake through solid steel. But you guys are all super strong, right?"
Kennedy: "Well... no."
Anya: "Right. Okay. But heart information, still good to know since holy water seems to run off these guys like they've been Scotchguarded. And, well, sunlight would work but guess what? They're not coming out during the daytime. Also, beware of their teeth and the claws they use to shred flesh."
Andrew's Easel-Pad: UBERVAMP
Hard to kill
steak(crossed out), stake
Anya: "We can't stop just because something else is trying to kill you, too."
Amanda: "Do you think there are going to be questions about her sex life on the test? Cause I really hope I don't have to study all that."
Buffy: "You good to help?"
Dawn: "Well, I was going to do lots and lots of homework but, darn the luck, they went and canceled school so looks like I got the time."
Caleb: "Oh, now, look... things don't go exactly your way so here come the waterworks. Ain't that just like a woman?"
Caleb: "Now, now, little girl. Manners. I do imagine that firebrand tongue of yours has inflamed many a man, weak as they are... This here's a public school, ain't it? Kind of deserted. Only just, I suppose. Folks work so hard at keepin the Lord out and look what happens in return. He abandons you."
Caleb: "Mind your manners. I do believe I did warn you once. You're angry, frustrated, scared... I like that in a girl. You really should relax a little. Look at where you are. History's going to look back at you, at me, at this place, and they're going to see the glory. Great things are happening now, right here. This school, the seal... it's all going to be a part of it. Now why would you want to miss that? More importantly, why would you want to get in its way?"
Buffy: "I guess I'm just ornery."
Caleb: "Oh, I knew you'd be a wild one. I'm going to take such sweet pleasure in taming you. I'll see you soon, little lady."
Andrew: "See, it's not the Hot Pocket itself - even though it did have that new-and-improved thicker tomato sauce - it's just the fundamental lack of respect."
Giles: "Shut up."
Giles: "Spike, I have a mission for you."
Spike: "Oh, really? Cause, you know, sometimes our missions end up with you trying to kill me. I'm not fond of those."
Kennedy: "What kind of band plays during an apocalypse?"
Dawn: "I think this band might actually be one of the signs."
Buffy: "Still able to make me see cartoon birdies all around around my head? You betcha. The short lack of consciousness was nice. I feel rested."
Buffy: "Is this a mission from which you intend Spike to return alive?"
Giles: "Yes. I sent Andrew with him."
Buffy: "Again, I ask the question."
The First/Buffy: "And how was our best girl?"
Caleb: "They always think they should put up a fight."
Andrew: "You sure you don't want to stop and pick up some burgers or something? You know, road-trip food?"
Spike: "It's not a road trip. It's a covert operation."
Andrew: "It's an onion and it's a flower. I don't understand how such a thing is possible."
Spike: "See, the genius of it is you soak it in ice water for an hour so it holds its shape. Then you deep-fry it root-side up for about 5 minutes."
Spike: "Yeah... Tell anyone we had this conversation, I'll bite you."
Wood: "So what changed? I mean, why didn't you fight back?"
Faith: "Other things matter more."
Wood: "I think you're worried about her."
Faith: "I think you need to brush up on your Buffy and Faith history."
Kennedy: "You have to pretend there's a big party here."
Xander: "That's fine. Parties in this house, I usually end up having to rebuild something."
Andrew: "'Can't' is a four-letter word! I'm Andrew. I'll be your bad cop this evening."
Monk: "You can't fight him. You can't stop him. You can only run."
Andrew: "'Run' is a four-letter word... a three-letter word."
Monk: "His temper... he was the purest evil I've ever seen."
Andrew: "Running away... saved your life... What does it say?"
Spike: "It is not for thee. It is for her alone to wield."
Buffy: "We've spent all this time worrying about the seal and the Hellmouth. Why isn't Caleb guarding them? Why doesn't he have somone there protecting it? Why is he camped out at the vineyard? The bad guys always go where the power is. so if the seal was so important to Caleb and The First, they would be there right now. They're protecting the vineyard or something at the vineyard. I say it's their power and I say it's time we go in and take it away from them."
Faith: "Or, in the alternative, how about we don't?"
Buffy: "I wish this could be a democracy. I really do. Democracies don't win battles."
Anya: "You really do think you're better than we are."
Buffy: "No, I-"
Anya: "But we don't know. We don't know if you're actually better. I mean, you came into the world with certain advantages, sure. I mean, that's the legacy. But you didn't earn it. You didn't work for it. You've never had anybody come up to you and say you deserve these things more than anyone else. They were just handed to you. So that doesn't make you better than us. It makes you luckier than us."
Faith: "I don't know if I can lead but the real question is... can you follow?"
Dawn: "You can't be a part of it... so I need you to leave. I'm sorry but this is my house, too."
Buffy: "Don't be afraid to lead them. Whether you wanted it or not, their lives are yours. It's only going to get harder. Protect them. Lead them."